April Day! Alitalia Si È Rotto

On August 1, airline industry analysts warned that high fuel costs were threatening to bankrupt more than 50 European airlines. The same day, The Financial Times reported that delivery of a rescue proposal for Italy's Alitalia Airlines would be delayed due to stalled merger negotiations. Days later, Silvio Berlusconi, Italy's Prime Minister, promised to save Alitalia from bankruptcy. 'We will perform another miracle and will offer a profitable national company, he said'. The Italian government owns 49% of Alitalia. The ensuing three weeks were filled with rumors of new investors and partners to save the troubled airline; until Thursday when it was confirmed that Alitalia had filed for bankruptcy protection.

You need to know that Alitalia history and Pavlov's Theory of Classical Conditioning to understand the impact this airline industry turbulence has had on me.

Anytime I hear the words Alitalia Airlines, the song Eh Cumpari plays in my head. The Italian novelty-song from the 1950's is about the different instruments from the orchestra playing the song. Julius La Rosa sang it, backed by Archie Bleyer's band. It's The Gaylords' cover of La Rosa's #1 hit that plays in my head. (I could only find La Rosa's version to put here.

for your entertainment).

Say "Alitalia" and I hear the whistle of the friscalettu; the toota of the saxofona; the pling of the mandulin; the zing of the viulin; the poppa-pop of the trumbetta and the story told during the extended instrumental bridge. It goes something like this:

I received a letter from my Uncla Guisseppe.
He tella me he heard from my Uncla Pasquale. Pasquale, he fly, he fly right into Italia. Onna big plane, he fly right into Italy.
They be in the air about 20 minutes an' the pilot, he come onto the radio.
"Hello, this is your cap-i-tan speaking. I just wonna tella you that earlier, we had a little bitta' trouble. Its-a all o.k. now, but I juss wanna to letta you know."
He be in the air about another 20 minutes an' the pilot, he come onto the radio.
"Hello, this is your cap-i-tan speaking. I just wonna tella you that we hadda a little bit more trouble. Its-a all o.k. now, but I juss wanna to letta you know."
He be in the air about another 20 minutes an' the pilot, he come onto the radio again.
"April Day! April Day! This is your cap-i-tan. We havin' a bigga trouble right now. We gonna haff to make a splash-down landing. All of the passengers, iffa you know how to swim, go to the right side of the airplane. All of the passengers, iffa you don't know how to swim, you go to the left side of the airplane.
After we hit the water, the people on the right - I tella you - you know how to swim, you swim to shore. We juss about 20 miles from shore. You gonna be o.k. The people on the left, those of you who do not know how to swim - I tella you - thanks a lot for flying Alitalia Airlines. (chorus)

I keep hearing on the news that Alitalia's bankrupt, but what I really hear is Tippity-Tippity-Ta!

[Eh Cumpari!]  [Alitalia Airlines]  [Silvio Berlusconi]
[Julius La Rosa]  [Archie Bleyer]  [The Gaylords]
[Pavlov: Classical Conditioning]

Schools Advised to Reject Middle Class

Professor John White, a member of a committee established to advise on curriculum changes in the U.K., will explain the suggestion that 'middle class' academic subjects should be removed from the national curriculum in junior high schools.

Children should no longer be taught traditional subjects at school because they are "middle-class" creations, the advisory panel concluded. Lessons should instead cover a series of personal skills.
Pupils would no longer study history, geography and science but learn skills such as energy-saving and civic responsibility through projects and themes.     ..the full article..
Energy conservation is a meaningful unit within a broader science course; ecology and conservation belong in geography; civic responsibility lessons are a by-product of studying history. It's necessary to understand how the past influences the present and predicts the future.

Available at chapters.indigo.ca

Geography, history, science and the arts are underfunded in education now - partly because funding levels consider student achievement on standardized tests. The standard tests focus on English and Math, yet an entire generation struggles with arithmetic, grammar, reading comprehension and writing. The panel's report claims that 'the aims [of changing the curriculum] include fostering a model pupil who "values personal relationships, is a responsible and caring citizen, is entrepreneurial, able to manage risk and committed to sustainable development".'

I support these goals, but I don't understand how removing social sciences is going to achieve them; however, I see there may be a buyer for my proposed course on Communication for Youth.

Among the units covered in my suggested class would be Communicating in Spontaneous Situations (Small Talk) and Conventions of Conversation.
The course would cover initiating, participating in and ending conversations. We'd discuss using humor, irony and sarcasm effectively, as well as the importance of thinking before speaking.

I can't decide if Communication for Youth will be a prerequisite or co-requisite of my proposed Common Sense 101.
I'll see what Professor White and his pals think.

Tags: [Prof. John White]  [Curriculum Review Committee]
["Middle Class" Subjects]
[Mark Bauerlein]  [The Dumbest Generation]

Coming Soon: Carbon Underground

A U.K. government sub-committee has a new proposal to reduce emissions.

"The influential Environmental Audit Committee says a personal carbon trading scheme is the best and fairest way of cutting Britain's CO2 emissions without penalising the poor.
Under the scheme, everyone would be given an annual carbon allowance to use when buying oil, gas, electricity and flights.
Anyone who exceeds their entitlement would have to buy top-up credits from individuals who haven't used up their allowance."    (More...)

To protect citizens against rising food costs, food ration cards for the poor were suggested in Russia just two weeks ago. The recommendation was sent back to the committee for more review as present-day paradigms of ration strategies were criticized as inefficient.

Experts point to the cost and bureaucracy involved to administer such a plan as primary flaws, but I see the potential for something worse: black market carbon trading and carbon credit identity theft. In 1941, rations were introduced to help manage the economy during WWII and the black market for unused ration coupons flourished.

Diabolical thinkers are probably already conjuring plans to control the worldwide supply of carbon credits.

Control carbon credits, Control the world! (insert evil laugh here)

What effect will the carbon credit underground have on Chicago's Climate Exchange (CCX), the world's first legitimate emission exchange?

Today's Climate Consideration: Isn't one who supports the carbon offset industry really a pro-polluter?

Tags: [Environmental Audit Committee]  [Carbon Rations]  [Carbon Offsets]
[Climate Change]  [Global Warming]
[Emission Exchange]  [CCX]
[Dr. Evil]  [Pinky & The Brain]

Page Six Goes Blank - There's A Dirt Shortage

John Aeschliman, an agriculturalist from Washington, is renewing calls for sustainable farming methods as a top soil shortage threatens.

"Disappearing dirt rivals global warming as an environmental threat"

"The National Academy of Sciences has determined that cropland in the U.S. is being eroded at least 10 times faster than the time it takes for lost soil to be replaced." It's not just run-off from water, either.

Ethanol from corn is often touted as a solution to the energy shortage. Problem is, those corn stalks that are being considered for clean energy are the same stalks that provide food to microorganisms in the soil. These same creatures aerate the soil which prevents rain run-off and erosion.

The Pacific Northwest Direct Seed Association, a regional farmers' association for no-till farmers is hosting its annual meeting this week. An initiative of PNDSA is the sale of carbon credits from no-till acreage. Land that hasn't been tilled retains carbon. "For every ton of carbon stored in the soil, 3.67 tons of Carbon Dioxide (CO2) are removed from the atmosphere."

Dirt farmers around the world are losing ground. Around the world! The Azerbaijan government identified desertification from erosion as a priority environmental concern in 2004. Azerbaijan!

I will do my part to save topsoil and you can too.
Send a check with your donation -payable to CASH (Concerned About Soil Horizons) to me.
C.A.S.H. -Funding Farmers' Fields of Dreams

Tags: [Sustainable Farming] [David Montgomery]
[Topsoil Shortage] [Joe Aeschliman] [PNDSA]
[Ethanol]

China Overrun With Irony

Merchandisers for the Beijing Olympics 2008 are frustrated by the availability of unauthorized apparel and souvenirs being produced by merchandise pirates.

Authorities had investigated about 80 commercial and personal Web sites selling fake Olympic merchandise, or lacking licenses to sell the legitimate product. "The supply channels on these illegal Web sites are chaotic," Xie Funing, a spokesman with the Olympic E-commerce Operation Centre, was quoted to say.

The Global Congress on Combating Counterfeiting and Piracy, called the illicit trade "a global epidemic reaching a scale now too great for individual governments, industry sectors or companies to solve."

China is the largest supplier of counterfeited merchandise worldwide. It is estimated to cost legitimate manufacturers $50 billion in sales.


Tags: [Beijing 2008]   [Fake Merchandise]   [China]
[Global Congress on Combating Counterfeiting]

Redundant Conclusions of Texas Brief

The Texas State Library and Archives Commission's working group to analyze government reports has found, after an 18 month study, that Texas has too many reports.

The Commission's 668-page brief lists the unnecessary reports that are still prepared by staff even though there is no longer a need for the data. "Report 1473 calls upon the Department of Aging to prepare a report, although the Department of Aging no longer exists. There are still report requirements for the Human Rights Commission, which the Legislature abolished in 2003."

Records administrator Michael Heskett points to the trend toward transparency in government and more open administration to account for the duplication of information and the preparation of parallel write-ups in past history.

To save money and paper, the legislature and state agencies can't afford to postpone until later their cooperation together to ensure that each and every report prepared will be to the mutual benefit of both parties.

Tags: [Texas State Library & Archive]   [Michael Heskett]   [Texas Reports]
[Pleonasms]

Humanity's Wallet

As a child I would sometimes ask, "Mom, are we rich?"
"We're rich in love," my Mom would reply.

My friends used to tell me that my family was rich. It was curious that they could be so sure when I wasn't certain myself. These same friends also told me that our house was haunted. Since there were occasions when I could confidently say that it wasn't, it was difficult to know when to trust their authority.

It's not that we were poor. Our needs were always met. The only things we were 'in-want-of' were truly extras. None of us suffered because we shared a bike or a bedroom. Each of us was so creative, however, we put on some good displays of suffering!

As I grew up, I better understood the elements of being rich in love.

Loyalty is the hundred dollar bill. You flash a roll of loyalty around because it says "Mess with me, mess with my whole family". That's good news for the family, bad news for the mess-er.

Understanding and faith are the Ulysses S. Grant of this currency. For kids, these fifties are rare and harder to part with. As adults, we understand items with tremendous value can be found for $50. Knowledge and compassion are factors of this bill.

Since it's the only denomination stocked in an ATM, humor has to be the double-sawbuck. Check the wallet of humanity of any member of my family, and you'll find at least five crisp bills of humor, receipts for a withdrawal today and yesterday and the day before. It's fully accessible, as convenient as a debit card, accepted almost everywhere and can be used to get 'cash back' on purchases. Looks like our particular banking plan allows unlimited debit card transactions.

As adults, respect is like a $5 bill. It may be a little humble, but this smallest denomination of paper money makes one feel richer. It's versatile - it's enough for two coffees, or a Frappuccino, or a
Grande Mocha, or an entire Happy Meal. The point is, $5 can get you a little or be stretched to get a little more.
As kids, respect was more like a commemorative coin. We gave it and knew a sibling would keep it in a safe place and occasionally pull it out of his/her memory to recount the specifics of the day it was presented.

That we can measure our fortunes in a currency other than cash makes us very wealthy indeed.

[Qualities of Humanity] [Measure Your Wealth]

Recall by Lexus Will Affect 55,000 Units

Lexus issued its 86th safety recall yesterday. The U.S. National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) issues recalls when an investigation concludes that "an auto manufacturer is found to be responsible for a serious safety or mechanical defect".

In the Lexus situation, incidents of accidental acceleration related to the Lexus ES350, Toyota RAV4 and Tacoma truck were reported to the agency in August.

"One driver told the agency the vehicle had hit speeds of 100 m.p.h. over a 6-mile stretch of freeway due to the problem. A Michigan woman said the problem caused her to lose control of her Lexus, triggering a rollover crash on I-75 that totaled her car."

Lexus will replace 55,000 floor mats that, when not properly installed, allow the mat to crowd under the gas pedal, interfering with the safe operation of the accelerator.

Owners of the Prius and Avalon are being asked to check the installation of their floor mats as a precaution.

This isn't about floor mats.
Part of the story is that since 1990, Lexus has issued just 85 recall notices to vehicle owners. That's across its entire line up of vehicles.
Over the same time period, Ford^* announced 1721 recalls; General Motors announced 1142⁺ recalls of its light truck and van lines; and Chrysler recalled the Sebring model alone 72 times since it was introduced in the 1995 model year!

Over 12 years, the Sebring has been recalled almost as many times as the complete product mix of Lexus over the past 17 years! And the Sebring is described by Canadian Driver with the following phrases: "high value", "solid performance", "consistent Chrysler quality".

The floor mat example demonstrates that it needn't require great expense or considerable time to return a vehicle to NHTSA safety standards.
But isn't it just a little embarassing that the #1 luxury car brand issued a recall involving a $25 rubber mat?

^* Refers to Ford branded models only. Does not include Mercury or Lincoln.
⁺ Applies to GMC light-duty trucks, vans, minivans.

Tags:   [Lexus]   [Toyota]
[Automotive Recalls]   [Accidental Acceleration]
[Runaway Audi Scandal]   [Detroit Three]
[Weiss Research]   [Automotive Recall Scoreboard]   [Floor Mats]

Further Reading on North American automotive market:
The Demise of the American Auto Industry and the Rise of Toyota
(Martin Weiss, Money and Markets, March 2007)

If the accelerator is stuck: Hook your toes under the pedal to free it up.
If that doesn't work, downshift into lowest gear (some pros say neutral) and apply the brakes.
Pull off the road once vehicle has slowed.

Squeezing Lower Prices

I don't shop at Wal-Mart. There are many reasons.

I don't like the way they do business. Here's how my relationship with Wal-Mart started:

When Wal-Mart came to Canada, it initiated a campaign to convince shoppers the merchandise in its stores was Canadian merchandise. It looked to me like Wal-Mart was disguising the truth. Sure, it buys merchandise from a warehouse located in Canada. That warehouse receives goods from an offshore supplier. The shipment was ordered and arranged by Wal-Mart. A Canadian truck delivers the cartons to the final destination. I know a little about Canadian content and I wasn't buying their claim. Wal-Mart hadn't demonstrated enough Canadian content for me.

Bryan Adams' album Waking Up the Neighbors was deemed ineligible for Juno award nomination in 1992. The CRTC concluded that the album did not meet Canadian Content (can-con) criteria. Amid tremendous controversy in 1991, Adams, his management and A&M Records convinced the CRTC to amend its criteria for Canadian content to include a Canadian artist who has collaborated with a non-Canadian and receives at least half of the credit for both music and lyrics. All about Bryan Adams Tags: [Bryan Adams] [Bruce Allen] [CanCon] [Juno Awards] [CRTC]

I'm all for great deals for shoppers; I absolutely support making money. I've seen corporate purchasing, and the bullying tactics of big retail on the suppliers...suppliers who are struggling to match increased volume at smaller margins and be profitable.

Sorry to put you through all this. I wanted to offer a little backgrounder before you went on to the next post. Will Work For Free?

Encyclopedia of Music in Canada

[Wal-Mart] [Everyday Low Price Strategy]
[The High Cost of Low Prices]

Will Work For Free?

The government in Mexico is concerned that Wal-Mart is exploiting local customs to increase the retail giant's profitability.

Wal-Mart is behaving a little badly? I'm shocked!

Thousands of adolescents work as unpaid baggers in Wal-Mart’s Mexican stores.
(Joseph Contreras, Newsweek, July 31, 2007)

Wal-Mart's Global Code of Ethics prohibits work without compensation.
(Click Picture to Read Excerpt)

When a company recruits teens to be volunteers, doesn't that make those teens employees?

"Wal-Mart de Mexico reported net earnings of $1.148 billion in 2006 and $280 million in profits in the second quarter of this year." Federal District Labor Secretary Benito Mirón Lince points out 'Wal-Mart has the capability to pay the minimum wage [of less than $5 a day], and this [unpaid baggers] represents an injustice.'

Wal-Mart explains that the company complies with the International Labor Organization's guidelines that prohibit employing youth under the age of 14. (At least since 2005, when "Wal-Mart agreed to pay the U.S. Labor Department $135,540 in civil money penalties to settle charges of 24 child-labor violations.")

A volunteer is "a person who performs a service willingly and without pay." Wal-Mart provides accident insurance to its volunteer baggers, and pays bonuses for academic achievement. Once you pay a volunteer, he is no longer a volunteer; he is an employee.

The government of Mexico doesn't like it, but is nervous to push Wal-Mart to change. Wal-Mart is the largest private company employer in the country. Mexico simply can't afford those 150,000 workers to be out of work.

I'm usually quiet about my preference to shop elsewhere; but I consider this too outrageous to ignore.

Wal-Mart squeezes the labor force in the name of low prices. Squeezing Lower Prices

Mexico Labor Report 2006

Tags: [Wal-Mart] [Walmart de Mexico]
[I.L.O.] [Newsweek] [Joseph Contreras]

Bank on It

"Hello, is this Christine?" the caller asked at about 4:30 p.m. on Saturday.
"Yes," I replied. "Who am I speaking with?"

"This is Anna. I'm calling from BMO Bank of Montreal. I'm calling to notify you that BMO has suspended your debit card privileges. Our Security Division made the decision to freeze your debit card at 12:06 p.m. today."
"What are you talking about?" I pay for 99% of all my purchases using the debit card. I hadn't been out since 11:00 a.m.

"Sometime during the past 4-6 weeks you made a purchase at a business that is part of a criminal investigation," she explained. "That business is alleged to have recorded information from some consumers' debit cards. I am not authorized to disclose any information about the identity of the operation or persons involved.
"There does not appear to be any suspicious activity in your account since the transaction at that location. I can't be certain that your debit card information was obtained by the alleged criminals when you completed your purchase.
"Your card and account information has been compromised. As a precaution we have restricted your debit card."

I'll straighten it out at the Branch.

Three years ago, BMO's transaction security shut down John's card after they suspected the card data had been ripped. Three "unusual" transactions were completed at an "unusual" location which triggered a red-flag at the bank.

Two years ago, my credit card was cloned. The bank called us after their warning system detected activity that was "out of the ordinary". Within hours of the first fraudulent transaction, it was completely resolved.

We continue to receive outstanding service from BMO and its banking professionals.

Some may say that they're protecting their money, but I prefer to regard it as BMO taking care of their clients. Thanks, BMO.

Tags: [Bank of Montreal] [BMO]
[Debit Card Fraud] [Credit Card Fraud]

Fluky Tidbits

Christopher Buckley's
Latest Lampoon
Blogger Cassandra Devine introduces Voluntary Transitioning as the solution to the U.S. Social Security crisis as Baby-Boomers retire.

Buckley's satire is based on this:
In 1950, 16 workers' contributions to Social Security in the U.S. funded one retiree.
In 2032, it is projected that only 2 workers will fund a Social Security beneficiary. (MacLean's June 18, 2007)

Cassandra's suggestion includes incentives to Boomers who volunteer to die at retirement age. It's ridiculous (isn't it?) to offer euthanasia to a generation in the name of fiscal economics...Watch what happens to Generational Divide after her blog posts.

Scared of the Social Security side of the novel? Then, read Boomsday (Twelve, Hatchette Book Group, 2007) for its secondary characters - the Congressman with Presidential ambitions, the sleazy Chief-of-Staff, the out-spoken Pro-Lifer, the back-room politics...and some of the best lines are given to The President.

Tags: [Boomsday] [Christopher Buckley]
[Social Security] [Political Satire]


It's chilee in Chile

Anyone else find it odd that 47% of traffic to this site originates in the U.S., compared to just 34% from Canada?

The point of this pie-chart is just to point out the 2% of readers from Chile!


[Gideon Payne] [Riley Peacham]

Plus, P. J. O'Rourke

An explanation of Adam Smith's thrilling 3-volumes on the mercantile system and economics...part of O'Rourke's "Books That Shook The World Series".

Even O'Rourke's sarcasm can't dismiss the relevance of Smith's economic theories..more than 200 years after he published them. Let's just say that O'Rourke's interpretation is plenty different than my Econ profs at university!

You just gotta admire that someone read the original 900 pages and offered up such an amusing summary!

Tags: [P.J. O'Rourke] [Adam Smith] [Wealth of Nations]